By Obiajulu Chiagoziem
Comedian Rob Beckett, has revealed that he ‘wished to be dead ‘during his work trip to South Africa, where he had mental health challenge.
Beckett revealed the long held secret in his new autobiography, where he stated that he had feelings that “it would be better if I was dead” as he struggled during 2020 and subsequently confessed that the thoughts came to him in form of a self doubt while filming a TV show in South Africa, despite the trip “surpassing my wildest dreams”.
He wrote: “On January 4, 2020, I was nailing it. I had just flown into Cape Town, South Africa, in first class to film a TV show. The show was watching cricket, drinking beer and going on safari with one of my best mates AND getting paid.
“This filming was squeezed in during a nationwide sell-out tour. Happily married to the love of my life, with two kids in a family home newly renovated, I had surpassed my wildest dreams.”
He continued: “‘But I was the unhappiest I have ever been. I woke up on January 5 in a five-star hotel room thinking it would be better and easier for everyone if I was dead.
“I put on a smile and finished filming. I got back to the UK and told my wife and my friend/manager how I felt.”
After revealing his predicament to his wife and friend/manager, he subsequently succumbed to therapy sessions, on a weekly basis for six months, confessing that he still checks in with the therapist when he feels at a low point.
“I am telling you this as I always promote the message that people should talk about mental health, but I rarely do,” he added.
“So here I am, talking. I wanted to die when I had everything I ever wanted. So never judge yourself for feeling low. Tell someone and they will help you feel better.’
He ended with a note that amidst the pandemic period, which really made him feel less of himself, he says he no longer lives in fear of failing to reach society’s idea of achievement.
“Each day can be a success if you go to bed after enjoying your day and you look forward to the next one. It has taken a long time and been quite a journey to get to this place, but I think Rob Beckett the person is learning to be as confident as Rob Beckett the performer.” he concluded.